We often hear from couples who were told to expect 10%, 15% or even 20% of their friends and family members to decline their wedding invitation, only to learn that every single invited guest has excitedly accepted. Needless to say, we're not big fans of this rule of thumb, because it can put the couple in the very tricky position of having more guests than available spaces on the guest list. If this sounds familiar, and you've clicked on this feature because you think you've invited too many people to your wedding, don't panic. We're here to help you address the age-old problem of receiving too many RSVPs!
What to Do When You've Invited Too Many People to Your Wedding
A Step-by-Step Guide:
1. Take a deep breath and do a thorough recount of your RSVPs.
2. If the information in any of the RSVPs was unclear, for example, the guest didn't specify whether both members of the couple, or all members of the family would be attending, drop them a line to double check. Also get in touch with any guests who have yet to RSVP.
3. You should now have the final guest numbers for your wedding. There may still be last-minute drop-outs, but these are generally hard to predict, so it's best to move forward with the current number.
4. When you've invited too many people to your wedding, there are two main causes for concern - venue capacity and budget. As there's no polite way to uninvite someone to your wedding, we don't consider this to be an option!
5. If capacity is the issue, get in touch with your reception venue (and caterers if applicable!) to see if they can accommodate the extra guests for dinner. Venues and caterers will probably have encountered this problem before, so they tend to have some creative solutions to offer. This might include reconfiguring the tables in the dining room, adjusting the layout of the dining room (you may want to rethink your donut wall and photo booth!), setting up tables in another room, setting up the dancefloor in another room, or hiring a marquee.
6. Confirm that your ceremony venue and drinks reception venue can accommodate the extra guests too, if these are separate from your reception venue.
7. If capacity is an issue that can't be fixed, you may need to go back to your guest list (this is an absolute last resort!). We suggest starting with good pals, cousins, or work colleagues, who won't be offended, who know each other and can do without plus ones. Some might even be happy to sit the meal out and come along for the party later on, especially if they have kids and are struggling with childcare. You'll know you can have these frank conversations with, and honesty is the best policy.
8. Get in touch with any other suppliers to let them know about the increased numbers. This might include your cake baker, florist (if you're having table centrepieces etc.), stationer, and transport provider.
9. If budget is an issue, you can either try to come up with some extra money to add to your budget (easier said than done!) or readjust the budget, making cuts elsewhere.
10. There aren't very many areas in which to save at this stage of wedding planning, when suppliers have been booked and deposits have been paid, so we suggest you look at food and drink first. Your venue or caterer may allow you to cut add-ons like canapés, late-night food, Champagne toast or open bar, or switch to a less expensive meal option like a buffet.
11. Other areas to look at for savings include style (if you have yet to buy your dress, suit, accessories, rings, bridesmaid dressses, etc.). Décor, gifts, and favours are the things people really won't notice. We have a post with 18 non-essentials you can cut right now!
12. Trust in the solutions that you and your suppliers have come up with, and know that everything will work out on the day. Your guests will probably be having such a good time that they won't suspect that there were last-minute changes to the plan.
You'll find lots more answers to frequently asked wedding-planning questions here.
