A love poem steeped in equality

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This poem has a unique quality in that it sounds familiar, but it's actually an unusual choice for a ceremony reading. To Love Is Not To Possess by James Kavanaugh is a beautiful poem by the American poet and revolutionary Catholic priest. It's a fitting choice for couples looking for a feminist wedding reading about equality in particular - but even if that's not what you're looking for, I think any couple will appreciate the sentiment in this one.

To Love Is Not To Possess by James Kavanaugh

To love is not to possess,
To own or imprison,
Nor to lose one's self in another.
Love is to join and separate,
To walk alone and together,
To find a laughing freedom
That lonely isolation does not permit.
It is finally to be able
To be who we really are
No longer clinging in childish dependency
Nor docilely living separate lives in silence,
It is to be perfectly one's self
And perfectly joined in permanent commitment
To another--and to one's inner self.
Love only endures when it moves like waves,
Receding and returning gently or passionately,
Or moving lovingly like the tide
In the moon's own predictable harmony,
Because finally, despite a child's scars
Or an adult's deepest wounds,
They are openly free to be
Who they really are--and always secretly were,
In the very core of their being
Where true and lasting love can alone abide.